life's like this - avianto's journal

been busy with my works and my photolog. i love my life =).

but recently i've been thinking about continuing my school outside of this miserable country by taking a postgraduate degree. well, since i am not a wealthy man or family, i had to found some scholarship but considering my undergraduate's grade it will be very hard to find one =(.

well, if you know any scholarship that consider portfolio and/or working experience, please let me know. thanks!

my rant: to study abroad you must have a lot of money. either you are very smart (and get the scholarship) or you are very rich. you could be dumb and stupid but if you are rich you can study abroad, get the job there and stay rich. how about some middle classes like me? are we doomed to be like this forever? well, i believe if my government do their job right against the corruption there will be plenty of financial aid to everybody. i often heard how the government official or the parliement official taking money as equal as *ten times* the money i need to study abroad. c'mon... what you going to do with that money? bribe God when you die so you can go to heaven? if you didn't take the money maybe a lot of indonesian people will have free education and i don't have to study abroad because there will be plenty of great school and opportunity in this country. what? i heard your denial about the corruption... hey! if you are poor when you were not a parliement member and after two years as a parliement member you can buy a billion rupiahs house then i really like to know how you can get that much money because i need those money to continuing my school and not to buy a house!

i felt a deepest grieve as my second cousin's husband passed away after in a coma for almost 2 months and almost 6 months before her father passed away too. as i visit the mortuary i can't stop thinking how fragile life is. i still vaguely remember the last time i met her husband. he was a young fellow, not too tall bad built and very much healthy. then one month later he got an accident that made him coma... then i went to my second cousin's house... and i just realized that this house had been a grieving house / Read more …

lately i've been so lazy that even i can not believe myself... wake up after 9am, show up *very* late at the office (yesterday was the worst, 2pm arrived at the office), went home very late, stay up all night in front of my computer doing nothing or just watch cable... this is worse... i don't know what happened with me but i feel it's time to change this bad behaviour (and yes, now is 9am and i am just wake up! argh...) / Read more …

as you can see, i moved some of the image to my -just launched, may have some error- photolog. go ahead, visit it... write your comment or just look around, but please let me know what do you think. thanks! now this journal back to its original purpose... a *text* journal with one or two related images and i think its the right time to re-design this section of avianto.com. but still got no right layout in my mind. maybe later. / Read more …

Which OS are You? kewl... / Read more …

[image moved to photolog] yesterday i saw 'inter culture jazz' at goethehaus, jakarta. great concert... small, cozy but really intimate... the atmosphere that i always love if i attend a concert. / Read more …

[image moved to photolog] these flowers grow in front of my home. just a week ago there are only about 3 big sunflowers, but suddenly they are sprout out and now there are more than 10 grow full and another 5 or 6 ready to bloom... it's nice to know that i had this kind of flower at home. / Read more …

[image moved to photolog] been gone to bandung for the last couple of days. having a great time with ayu there. thanks girl! i really need this getaway weekend as i am getting real bored with my surrounding... well, i had to pass my office building to get out of my area, so you can imagine my boredom. well. i took many photos there, but i will post them when my photolog's layout is finished... i can't promise the time but i hope soon enough. / Read more …

[image moved to photolog] sundanesse dinner... *yummy*. my office friend was celebrating his birthday today and that picture is explaining what will happened if 9 hungry people are eating on the same table. / Read more …

[image moved to photolog] that's my second cousin, once removed. he will be 1st year old this month and he is very crazy about getting his picture taken. today my family had a gathering. we gather to plan my second cousin's wedding. it will be held around mid-may but we had to prepare from now. this kind of gathering was a very rare occasion happening in my family... everybody are busy with their own life, so this is quite a great moment. confuse about the term 'second cousin, once removed'? don't be. use this link or this link or this / Read more …

[image moved to photolog] may our sacrifice in this holy moment will bring people in need more joy to celebrate with us and bring them brighter hope for the future. amen. / Read more …

[image moved to photolog] this is one of my random shot with the new digital camera. not much for an object, say? well, at least this cat is very cute and it know how to act in front of the camera. i don't have much time to explore this amazing piece of gadget yet. maybe this weekend... well, so much to do but so little time. / Read more …

amazing movie. i just saw gangs of new york and this is a very interesting and well done movie. the camera work is superb and the story (based on herbert asbury's book with the same title) is intriguing and exciting. well, this is an oscar's material.... warning: this movie is not a shame to show blood and gore. if you dislike that kind of stuff, let me remind you that this is the major theme of the movie. it's about violence... real violence... and it based on a historical event. yes, history is *that* violent. / Read more …

this guy got married today! looks like a wedding website is become a quite common these day, so this guy had this website as his wedding background story, invitation and everything else. congratulation ardy & ayu. may your marriage will bring you two a happy life. enjoy! / Read more …

the newest arsenal on my gadget collection, the 'tight budget' digital camera olympus c-4000 zoom. well, it's been a while since i'm using a camera. my old canon eos-m is somewhere around the box but i think i am thru with the old way. it's digital time... but since it's been a while, i had to re-learn a lot because i almost forgot about everything photographic =(. / Read more …

i always love online design magazine. they can be great resources to my creativity. one of my favorites are this is a magazine. today with issue 8 online. and how design is just online with new look. check it out. / Read more …

i missed someone... in the middle of the rainy night. wish i could be somewhere else. just missed someone that much... and when I close my eyes you'll be right by my side if I could have just one request stay with me girl I confess all my only dreams           all my only dream - the wonders / Read more …

what will you do if somebody you care told you that she/he was lonely? and she/he live in the different city... i never had a rignt answer to that kind of situation... well... if i could i would rush down to their city and accompany them until they get bored with me... =). but, the truth is that statement really put me into awkward situation... should i respond? maybe they just want to say that they are lonely and not really need me to answer that... or maybe they wish they had somebody (it may not be me either)... or / Read more …

i bow my head as i give my condolence to the families of Columbia space shuttle crews. read the news and cnn's special report. to my amazement that dubya didn't use this tragedy as another reason to enhance his personal 'war on terror' campaign. thanks dubya. / Read more …

Cozy Street Corner’s second album Nirmana (which first album goes beyond my radar and I still can’t get it now… Anybody care to help me?) is a mixed bag of a very wide variety kind of music. It will be a very absurd effort to fit CSC’s music into any kind of popular genre because I believe is not the kind of music CSC is creating. / Read more …

all i want to be. all i need to be. all i have to be.... no matter what, i am still here... And you see the things they never see All you wanted, I could be Now you know me, and I'm not afraid And I wanna tell you who I am Can you help me be a man? They can't break me As long as I know who I am         i'm still here - john rzeznik / Read more …