life's like this - avianto's journal

now i know what make me still hold on... there is still something left after all...

desperate for changing starving for truth closer where i started chasing after you

i'm falling even more in love with you
letting go of all i've held onto
i'm standing here until you make me move
i'm hanging by a moment here with you

forgetting all i'm lacking
completely incomplete
i'll take your invitation
you take all of me

now.. i'm falling even more in love with you
letting go of all i've held onto
i'm standing here until you make me move
i'm hanging by a moment here with you

i'm living for the only thing i know
i'm running and not quite sure where to go
i don't know what i'm diving into
just hanging by a moment here with you

there's nothing else to lose
nothing left to find
there's nothing in the world
that could change my mind
there is nothing else
there is nothing else...

        Hangin' by a moment - Lifehouse

yeah. she's done it again. again and again. and again. she's never stop. she's just repeating herself over and over again. i tried so hard to understand. yes, i am understand, understand it too much. but it seems like she didn't even realized that. she's just done it again and again and again. i don't know which will hurt me more, loosing her or keep getting hurt again and again by her. she's just done it again and i believe she's don't understand why and if i want to make the point of it she will blame me again and / Read more …

lately i've been quite addictive on listening to internet radio. two of my favorite radio station are kcrw and the british's virgin radio. anyone got another recommendation? / Read more …

today i had lunch with some of designfaculty's crew: me, the boss aka. gumilang, godote, thalia, marthin, gigih and djaka. the news: here the pictures: here thank you guys.. and gal. see you again soon! / Read more …

just download unreal tournament 2003's demo. damn! this is a great game! remind me a lot of my quake II dan quake 3 arena days. i must buy it as soon as the stores are open again after this christmas. i played the demo for 2 straight hours and glad that my shooting skills is not really degraded... i wonder why i am suck at counterstrikes but quite good at quake and unreal? they are fps action game, right? maybe i am just not used to 'ordinary' weaponry... =P well. if you like fps action game, buy this game! or / Read more …

i've lost all my dream. i just realized that... life is become too common for me. like walking in the same street over and over again. like watching the same sunset at the same beach over and over again. / Read more …

i've got the feeling that someone that i really need isn't need me anymore... it just like that, maybe it just me but lately this feeling really bother my reality as if there are nothing left there. only a fraction of the past that still linger inside the very corner of the heart just wait to wash away with something easily. and of course, it hurts... a lot... Come up to meet ya, tell you I'm sorry You don't know how lovely you are I had to find you, tell you I need you And tell you I set you / Read more …

aan had done something cool again. i wonder if this boy ever stop doing surprise. now he creates koverplastik, a website that feature pop culture music or something like that. nice work an! btw, from koverplastik i discover this amazing website. nice work fairy, love to see your writing and review. another daily visit then. / Read more …

well, six feet under... i love this tv series. why? maybe because of its dark and twisted humor, maybe because of its too absurd to be true storyline but yet still believable, maybe because of its splendid characterization shown by the actor/actress... i don't know, i just happened to like it and i like it a lot. the way the story told, it always started with the death of someone... hey, its a story about a funeral house, somebody had to die to begin the story with, is brilliant. every episode is coming with some interesting story and great character / Read more …

not much happened. heavy rain outside. most people just sit and talk to each other. so when my colleagues went to lunch somewhere out of the building i quickly join them. after that, a couple game of pool to finish our lunch break and then back to the office. not much happened, right? / Read more …

... feel real love. to love and to be loved without any consequences. ... enjoy live. a live that no matter hard still give me something to be thanked for at the end of the day. ... wish everybody a wonderful life. so wonderful that will be no need to harm others. / Read more …

just found out my mugshot at designiskinky.net (search for 'avianto'). thanks to darbotz for mail me this info. / Read more …

ied mubarak to all muslim around the world. may Allah SWT bless and save us. peace. / Read more …

ied fitri. a celebration after a month of ramadhan's fasting. a day to contemplate and to remember about life after fasting. for me ramadhan is not just a celebration... in fact it's not a celebration at all. / Read more …

until 11th of this month i will had a very hard time to online. yeah, it's all because cable's technician are all having their vacation until 10th and no backup/emergency technician. well. what a service, eh? really. i almost come to a conclusion that *all* services in this particular country is meant to rip the customer and not serving them. cool... so. until then. see you around. / Read more …

finally. bought a cheap modem, just to stay connected for a while. until then! / Read more …