life's like this - avianto's journal

O Me! O Life!


O ME! O life!... of the questions of these recurring;


Of the endless trains of the faithless—of cities fill’d with the foolish;


Of myself forever reproaching myself, (for who more foolish than I, and who more faithless?)


Of eyes that vainly crave the light—of the objects mean—of the struggle ever renew’d;


Of the poor results of all—of the plodding and sordid crowds I see around me;


Of the empty and useless years of the rest—with the rest me intertwined;


The question, O me! so sad, recurring—What good amid these, O me, O life?





Answer.


That you are here—that life exists, and identity;


That the powerful play goes on, and you will contribute a verse.


Walt Whitman (1819–1892).
Leaves of Grass.
1900.


very inspiring, very hope building, very lifely...

the contact page is fix now. my new server didn't provide the formmail cgi script so i use formmail php instead. now... all links supposed to work all right, please contact me if you find anything that seems not quite all right. thank you. / Read more …

i just change my front page. i already know that it would look like hell with netscape 4 and below and i promised that i will fixed that soon (a browser detection seems the only option i had). so tell me your opinion on my front page. now, i want to get some comfortable sleep which i lack for a while. / Read more …

thanks to my luv, now i had two more of roald dahl's book in my hand: george's marvelous medicine and boy-tales of childhood. geez, i can't get enough of roald dahl, aren't i? / Read more …

is the most recent book i read. it was a great book (read the excerpt) by Roald Dahl. it really made me realize that i, in some other special way, missed my father so much. *sigh*... / Read more …

just add this website at Diarist.Net. so if you think that i deserve some recognation, vote for me, will you? (please? *very-big-grin*). another thing to consider is that i want you, my worthy visitor, to notice that i don't have any guestbook or whatsoever. but i put the 'comments' link at the end of every entry that i wrote. so please use it... it will make me know what others think about the topic that i wrote. and i was added by tyaz to her blogger. so i will rants there sometimes in my native language, indonesian (i just hate / Read more …

nothing much to do, i had to come to the office thou... but i didn't. i just want to get lazy, it's sunday for all the good day's sake. so, today i just squashed some bugs on my almamater's website (well, this *is* what i did when i was lazy... programming! *geez*), browsing the web, reading other journal and some asp files (warning to those NT-based website, your global.asa revealing too much information!), watching tv and some other lazy stuff... yeah, right! when i was browsing the web, i found out a lot of personal website using "name" like: negeri / Read more …

since my father's fatal car's accident. it means that i've been living only with my mother for that much years... i can't remember him much, except some of the precious moment at an airfield (he was an hang-glider pilot), my 3rd birthday and others that just like a snapshot in my brain. i don't know if i missed him or not, because i just don't know him well enough. but i believe that i love him and tonight i will send my best prayer to him. may God bless him... do you know your father well? / Read more …

i just read this verse. well, it seems like these are the words that keep bangin' inside my head from couples of month ago. WHAT am I, after all, but a child, pleas’d with the sound of my own name? repeating it over and over; I stand apart to hear—it never tires me. To you, your name also; Did you think there was nothing but two or three pronunciations in the sound of your name? walt whitman, what am i, after all hmm... seems that i've got an identity crisis, eh? / Read more …

today is my birthday... i wish i could say more... but i couldn't. i wish i could write something... but i just couldn't i wish i could tell about anything... but my mind went blank, so i couldn't i wish i could ... well, anyway... it's still my birthday... / Read more …

at last, my subdomain is active. from today onward, the main page at http://www.avianto.com will become just a portal where all of my works will be linked there. and for the log... well, it stays here. thank you for your support all this time... i can't thank you enough. / Read more …

well, after some major discomfort including the very *slow* update on my latest subdomain (it still not working when i post this) i finally decided to post this entry... it's already april... my month because i will turn 26 (yikes) this month, so what is more better than changing this website look to celebrate it? =) life had been dull for a while... nothing much to celebrate and nothing much really happened. it's a very dull life here... i just hope this month forward will provide me with excitement i always crave about. / Read more …