life's like this - avianto's journal

chaotic mind sindrome

did you ever feel stressed out and must finished something then you just fall asleep? and how did you felt when you woke up?
*argh*... it's very... very... frustrating!!! yeah, i had it just a couple of hours ago... and it really turn my mood down.

so, i have to work double time now because today i have my mentoring session at 10.00 sharp... and i have to finish a couple of drawing and print them out before that time... okay, on my work now.

murphy's law and my day my statement: i must begin to draw.... i must begin to draw... i must begin to draw... i must finish at friday! the rules: murphy's law no.2 : everything take longer than you think... my statement: argh, panic strikes... i am sleepy... argh, wake up... wake up... *zzzzzzz* the rules: murphy's law no. 1 : nothing as easy as it looks read this if you want to know more about murphy's law. / Read more …

panic strikes!!! second day of the holy month of feast and five days until the deadline of final presentation's final drawing, could i make it? i should have, shouldn't i? argh, not really in the mood to post something... but i don't have anything worth to do... so i think i should post just this one... looks like i am beginning to start panic... *grin* / Read more …

to all moslem around the world today is the first day of the holy month of feast, the ramadhan. may God give us strength and faith to all of us. amen. / Read more …

humble opinion on my new feature i just read an entry at bukrie's website about the "open link in new window" check button that i have as a new feature (look at the right side of this writing and on the very top of it) posted at 11/23/2000 04:06:50 AM he said: (translated to english) "what for? let others do what they like....*cut*.... i think that internet is a "freedom area" and we can do whatever we want, so why creating an expression of begging for visitor to still open our site? if they like it they will do it / Read more …

what lies beneath and hell hot chilli pepper hmm... just watched "what lies beneath", good thriller movie and pretty jumpy to watching at. michelle pfeiffer really put on a great act on this movie and what a rarity seeing harrison ford as an antagonist character... =) next stop... 'ruang tengah ardan', watching an anime movie... eating a 'big' supper... i mean 'big'! and before i went home i tried an ingredient that i believe was made in hell!!! a very... very... very... hot chilli sauce and trust me it felt like you were swallowing a great big ball of fire.. / Read more …

tonight... i'm gonna have myself a real good time... yesterday was a great day... =) my mentor said ok to my site plan design, so on to production for it!!! but my dormitory's plan need some adjustment especially the fire escape stair. hmm, now i can present this draft to other mentors as well... hope to have some input from them. hmm, i must leave my cubicle in a couple of minute... just want to buy a train ticket to jakarta. i am just thinking, should i go home at the first day of the feasting month? hmm, interesting thought / Read more …

thanks wio, for mentioning this place on yours. it's a pleasure knowing you and your site... =) and for those who are reading these, give her a visit... her website really prove my belief that web can be an expression of true self... and don't forget to sign her guestbook too... =) hmm, it makes make think... should i have a guestbook? could you give me some advice? oh, i almost forgot to mention, mdamt gave me a mail told me about 404 error on some of my links, thank you mdamt... but regretfully i must said that i am / Read more …

i need some help with this place... i know i can do it myself if i had more time, but with the close incoming of my final presentation (i know, i know, i should not update this website too if i am *that* concern of it, but hey... i have a little free time and *whoooz* it just happened!). i need a php script... yep, i asked for a php script... =( i need a script that works this way: 1. a *.php page (i will name it page(a)) with form(b) and a line "include('file(c)')" 2. an user fill the / Read more …

still not finish updating yet, but i've uploaded some stories (the old one for you all regulars)... found this page. it's a personal site, by an indonesian girl with some attitude and the bad thing is that i can not put it on my 'others' link because it's not a weblog site... what a shame... =( damn it... i have to continue working on my final presentation... okay, monday will be my 'fast track' schedule then. hope nothing will disturb it anymore. on to production! / Read more …

ok, i've decided to change face (again)... it's not 100% complete, so if you've got a broken link... well, let me say: give me about one or two days to fix things up. and from now on i will put links to other weblogger, so if you had one, please feel free to mail me. thank you for your kind attention. / Read more …

well, the website is not complete yet... sorry, but i am too sleepy to continue finished it (not to mention that i should be working on my design... *grin*) but i found this website anti-sinetron, if you are an indonesian then you will know what 'sinetron' means... and for those foreigner out there, sinetron is a cheap version of soap opera... yep cheap... you said that soap opera is cheap? then imagine the show that cost cheaper... got it? okay, that's sinetron. / Read more …

hey, look at me! i just woke up just like any normal person... =) today is the only day in my whole 'final presentation life' that i woke up exactly at 6.00 am. well, seems today will be an okay day, i can feel it... it feels exactly the opposite way than last week... hope that i really can enjoy this day... on to living! / Read more …

i am at 100% self again today, but i am sick of this final presentation thing... yeah, it's only 2 weeks left and i feel sick *grin*. it seems like this stuff never end... and i keep working on something that i don't think i should working on... and it always raining everyday... water everywhere... and it feel really chill right now... and i am tired... / Read more …

only had about two hours sleep... should i sleep now? or should i force it until morning again? it's so noisy here... i think i can't sleep... =( / Read more …

well, i am back at 75% self again... not yet on full power but i can do what i must do now... design!!! my design is about 80% finished and it only need some adjustment and believe me, i don't want to change it anymore! it's fixed for me and for my mentor and i am tired to change it every week... okay, back on my design... wish me luck thou... =) / Read more …

this old article and this another one maybe could inspired one of you out there to made a website... it's a short article but really get right to the point... that article remind me back then, when i've decided to made this website and since then... well, here i am... =) / Read more …

today was cool... woke up at 12.00 AM *grin* spend the rest of day continuing my design... back to reality folks! too many broken heart, too many bad mood, too many miserable thoughts... so, i made some progress with my design, hmm... must get overwork now, it's getting closer to the final presentation day. now i must re-plan some of my schedule so i could work more smoothly... ok, i am log out now. / Read more …

did you ever had a couple days with somebody you love and that days just gone wrong? i did, it happened to me just yesterday and the day before yesterday... i have a great chance to make one of the greatest day in my life and i blew it!!! ah, fool me... looks like the effect of 'friday hell' still not left me yet and my love was getting all the blame... =( what should i do? it will not be the same ever, anymore... =((( / Read more …

i hate waiting... that's why i always keep moving. tonight i am waiting, for a phone call, a news about someone arrival... and i am still waiting, that's why i am now still here at my small cubicle, ranting, yawning and boring. damn it, just a little news so i can plan something... i am hungry, miserable and want to stroll the city... but... i have to wait!!! *sigh*... / Read more …

this post will close one of the most suckiest day in my life (until now...) and i hope this kind of day will never ever happen to me again, please... =( i feel terrible all day, it feels like i can't get my ex-girlfriend out of my mind... imagining she with her new boyfriend made me miserable, mad, chaotic, angry and of course idiotic... she kept bugging my head... and to make thing worse, i believe that she didn't even care about what i felt, yeah... she's that kind of girl, not her fault tho, it just her style... *sigh*... / Read more …

see, i told you that this day will be suck!!! i called my ex-girlfriend, only to found out that she already had a new boyfriend and she didn't want me to know anything about him!!! and to make thing worse, my phone call rejected a couple of times because she's waiting for this boyfriend to call her! damn it! have a heart will you! this is somebody who once (and i think still) love you and devoted much to you... this guy lost two, er.. no, three chances with other girls because of you!!! this guy give everything to you / Read more …

i think i've made progress in my design... that's a good thing. 29 days left until the final presentation and make it 25 days left because all of my drawings should be collected four days before the final presentation, that's short right? hmm, tomorrow is my ex-girlfriend birthday... i am still can not get rid her from my mind, it seems like just yesterday we've been together, damn it... =( and i can't go to jakarta because i am now too busy!!! maybe just a phone call will be nice... or... ah, i have to forget her, she didn't even / Read more …

today is my mentoring session... hmm, what should i present to my mentor? well, the baseplan i think, it's almost finished... =) wondering when i can have another mentoring session with other teachers, should schedule it from now... it's only one month to my final presentation (8th december, that's it!)... okay, my friend asked me: "you are not panic yet? it's only a month left, damn it!"... well, it seems that my sense of panic, chaos and confusion because of this final presentation had been cut off a long time ago... he he he. well, time to get some rest / Read more …

monday will be over soon... okay, i've got some ideas for my new design and i must do it quick!!! only four weeks left for the final presentation... okay, back to work now.. but, i think i better sleep first then wake up at around 01.00 am... well, i guess that's it... / Read more …

at last... my cubicle is a little bit cleaner than usual. shopping for soap, shampoo and toothpaste... i need to re-supply them. bought cereal for breakfast at campus, i will spend more time here until i finish my final assignment so i need to pack up some food... =) coffee... check, sugar... check, supplemental drink... check, else that matter... check. hmm, i think i better sleep soon enough, i have to start working on my design tomorrow. until then, wish me luck, ok? / Read more …

okay, it's sunday already... now, i *must* clean up my cubicle. it started to getting very cluttered with all the junks, papers, clothes and everything else that matter. so... today first on my *to do* list is: clean this mess!!! then, maybe stroll the town with my girl but i must at home at 02.00 pm, because i have an invitation for the neighborhood's meeting (whoa, i never thought they've invited me... after all, i am just a tenant there). that's it for now, i think i need some rest now. / Read more …

is it me? or the world just slowed down? it's been five days passed in this week and still i am produced nothing or thinking nothing about my design... oh well, maybe i am just tired or maybe this sickness really made me slowed down... =( / Read more …

now i am sick... coughin' a lot.. maybe i should stop smoking too... hey, don't bother with me with some advice about smoking, i know it is a bad habit and i tried to quit, i really do so instead of trying to advice me, please just wish me luck... =) And i am still not working on my current design... what a crap... =( so here i am, sick.. twisted... hearing some unknown and uneasy song... and writing this rants for you... what a day, eh? / Read more …

sorry for the lack of updates lately... i am too busy with the second preview, then went to Jakarta to rest and talk to my mentor about the result of second preview... then went back to Bandung again, just to found out that there are so much to do with my design... because there were a lot (i really mean when i said *lot*) of change with my current design that i must show at my last final test at the beginning of December (yep, it just one month!!!)... so here i am, at my cubicle... rambling about life again... / Read more …